Goodbye
by Anyu Matsuri
Summary: Zero and Ichiru's last time together, with flashbacks from their past. Song by Secondhand Serenade. My very first fan fiction ever written! Anyway, there's no yaoi, only shounen-ai. I think it's a lot better if you listen to the song while reading.


**Disclaimer: The song lyrics do not belong to me but to Secondhand Serenade; and so does the anime and characters. Please don't sue me for this!**

**Warnings: I stared blankly into the space the whole time while I was writing this and also after writing this, so whether if you cry or stare blankly into space too then it is in your discretion. You may laugh if you want, or curse or anything. I don't care. (I think this looks more like a warning to myself rather than to you guys.)**

**To understand this story better I think you should watch Vampire Knight first. It will be stupid to just try guessing the story by basing it on this fan fiction, since this is written in the perspective of a fujoshi.**

_It's a shame_

_That it had to be this way_

_It's not enough to say I'm sorry_

_It's not enough to say I'm sorry_

**Zero**

Ichiru and I are the cursed twins. But why does it need to be like that? Now, as I walk upstairs this winding and endless staircase I'm wishing that Ichiru will be alive once more after I settled everything. And then we could live as family after that. With no more grudges and obligations and ancient curses rested on our shoulders.

But, I know that it won't come true, for twins born under vampire hunter parents are doomed not to exist. They will eventually end up finishing each other.

_Maybe I'm to blame_

_Or maybe we're the same_

_But either way I can't breathe_

_Either way I can't breathe_

**Ichiru**

At a young age I know that I won't ever last for long. But I had accepted it gratefully, because I have a loving twin that is always looking out for me. I know that he loves me, even though he won't say it personally. Though I'm only picturing it in my mind, I do like how he gets flustered over simple matters so easily~

But then, why did I have to hear that? If only I hadn't gone to the bathroom way past my bedtime, I wouldn't have done this foolish thing. I wouldn't have fallen in love with a vampire.

_All I_

_Had to say is goodbye_

_We're better off this way_

_We're better off this way_

**Zero**

Everything changed that night when the sky was crying pure white snow. It was winter, but when _she _came the night wind brought in sakura petals. Then I noticed Ichiru missing. Where can he might be? He shouldn't wander at a time like this, especially with a vampire in the house! But then it was all too late, I was already bitten and turned to a vampire. Before I blocked out I saw Ichiru standing behind _that _monster.

_Run away Ichiru!_ Was what I managed to say before I blocked out. When I woke up I saw Kaien-richijo, and then I was brought to their house, until now.

After many years I saw Ichiru again, but this time it was different. He had worked all this years under the very same vampire that turned me into the monster that I am now. So I guess I hate him. But then, why does it feel so wrong?

_I'm alive_

_But I'm losing all my drive_

'_Cause everything we've been through_

_And everything about you_

**Zero**

My body feels different after drinking up all of Ichiru's blood. I feel stronger, though there's a feeling in my heart that I still can't place. Was this guilt? I can't shrug all of these feelings from my heart.

Does it really need to be this hard to let go of everything?

_Seemed to be a lie_

_A guiltless, twisted lie_

_It made me learn to hate you_

_Or hate myself for letting it pass by_

**Ichiru**

Someone killed Shizuka-sama. I know that it is not Zero, but it's natural for me to put the blame on him. After all, he was the one who first wounded Shizuka-sama. But then, why? Why does it feel so wrong? Like I'm being completely unreasonable? Though I should have lost all feelings of guilt against Zero long ago, bits still linger.

What was the reason for all of this?

_All I_

_Had to say is goodbye_

_We're better off this way_

_We're better off this way_

**Ichiru**

I am now standing in front of you. Though I won't let you know that I'm about to die. I still want to jeer at how you've become a loser. Truly your name befits you; Zero, one that has nothing and nothing to get. Though, I still want to end up in your arms.

You don't really know how much I missed being hugged by you on the nights we slept together. The guilty look you'd shot at me every time you thought you did something wrong. That embarrassed look of yours whenever your feelings show through.

You always wear a fake mask of toughness, when truly, underneath that is someone who is extremely fragile. I guess; I'm tougher than you, right?

_And all I_

_Had to say is goodbye_

_We're better off this way_

_We're better off this way_

**Zero**

Why do I have to lie even to myself when the truth was that I truly hate Ichiru? I truly hate him, for he was the reason why I was suffering like this now.

But why does this feels like the biggest lie that I ever said?

_And every, everything isn't only_

_What it seems so hold these_

_Words that you never told me_

**Zero**

Deep down in my heart I had longed for him, though I think I never liked to acknowledge that. So is that the reason why I don't know of these feelings?

And now, as he lay dying in my arms, all that I'm wishing for is more time for us to be with each other. I don't want to end everything on such a sad note.

_It's time to say goodbye_

_It's time to say goodbye_

_It's time to say goodbye_

_Goodbye_

_Bye_

**Ichiru**

Even at a time like this. Do you need to be such a crybaby? I'm freaking dying already, don't you see?

But then, your warm teardrops on my shoulder make me not regret that I had given up my life or you. That in such a short time I was able to be with you. That in my last seconds I am tightly in your arms. You love me too, right?

_Take my pain away_

_Tear it out_

_Tell me I was wrong_

_Tell me I was wrong_

**Ichiru**

Forget about the name of the one that had been the cause for all your misery. Take my life, and make me yours. After all, we are not supposed to be born apart right?

You are really too kind, even before birth, to let me take some of your strength to be able to have a brief glimpse on this beautiful yet cruel world.

And now I'm giving it back to you, so that I'll be with you forever. Why aren't you scolding me now? Isn't it just right for an older brother to reprimand the younger one? Why won't you hate me now?

_Take my pain away_

_Tear it out_

_Tell me I was wrong_

_Tell me I was wrong_

**Zero**

That's impossible; I cannot simply hate you, because you are important to me.

**Author's Note: My heart broke when I reread this. I never thought that I'm going to write a story that will make my own heart break! Or maybe it was just because of the lyrics? Well, maybe it was the effect of the lyrics. The emotions in here were not completely distinguished from one another right? **

**What do you think? Was it worth reading? Then, if you do or do not think so, then please review~! Well, tell me if I have to rewrite this. I don't like fake praises.**

"**A goodbye does not mean that everything ended at that spot. It just means that a new thing is about to start."**

**My mood's a bit rocky today so I guess I'm too emotionless. Anyway, 'til the next.**


End file.
